Control over my Life

It’s kind of estranged when your reality is not synchronous with the world around you; you might begin to think something’s wrong, that you might be schizophrenic and of course there are other illnesses which can cause symptoms, like delusions or hallucinations.  Getting the correct diagnosis is the first step in getting help.  As I had become a drug addicted teenager, I found I had very few friends and lost the respect of a good many people; success was not in using drugs, and I began to understand that there was something not quite right with the way I thought.  Fear began to eat away at my mind, having no friends my age, those I gained were much older than me and I didn’t understand anything about them, except drugs and alcohol.  As I grew older and finally taking psychiatric treatment, Alcoholics and Narcotics Anonymous seriously, knowing I was the cause of my own problem, other problems began to set in.  My social life had changed, not so much because of my past association with drugs, yet my physical health did.  Bad bladder, constant diarrhea, headaches and pains in knee joints and arms, I thought I was falling apart again, only this time physically.  I began to feel I was truly mentally ill besides being sickened by other health issues.  I did not concede to give thought that these illnesses were affecting me socially, yet they were and before I began my cessation of drugs and alcohol, I had no perception of any illnesses at all, yet those people I tried to associate with believed differently.

These health issues did affect me in the beginning and eventually the illnesses caused my few friends to wander into the sunset leaving me standing alone in my fears and anxiety as I began to avoid social fraternizing simply because of the control I was losing over my own physical health.

So how do you see your life as wonderful again, after nearly destroying yourself and those you love.  You can change your life for the better by taking care of yourself, both mentally and exercising physically, meeting new people in places where you would share some commonality and by maintaining your belief in that your treatment is working because you have gained confidence.  Take control, even if you might believe it will take some time to cure your illness, take the necessary steps and relate this to your doctor or clergy; he or she is a professional and they are the ones who can provide you with an effective working treatment.

Written by Donald S.

A Recovery Story

I have read a few recovery stories, reading them now and then, to keep myself in check with my own Recovery and therapy.  I often cheer for those who have overcome their drug use, their alcoholism and still battle with having to overcome the mental diagnosis which caused them to forsake the world they live in.  The person I am writing about at this time lived a clean and sober life after getting out of prison for many years, then suddenly relapsed on cocaine and became lost in despair and recklessness, living the same abandonment he suffered in his childhood.  He caught himself falling and faced his mistakes once again, this time teaching others as a peer specialist, he has relapsed and gained strength again as others before him have done.

As he began to slip away from his sobriety, thievery began to take him down into other depths.  He had been married and began using again on the streets, literally stealing from his job, yet as he understood what he was doing, he turned and faced the problem he was having and began to stand up again to the circumstances which caused his problem.  He said one reason he relapsed is because he forgot his coping skills as he is a trained mental health educator, who has a dual diagnosis—mood disorder and drug addiction.  He eventually checked into the hospital knowing this was the most necessary of things to do.  This same man was an ex-convict and those whom he had worked with who were either drug users or drug dealers who he felt put his sobriety in danger.

Ex-Convict Uses Battle With Addiction and Mental Illness to Help Others - NYTimes.com

“The mental health care system has long made use of former patients as counselors and practice has been controversial…”

For one thing our ex-drug addict/convict is a self taught ex-convict who has become a prominent peer trainer giving classes across the country today.  He is one of the small number of people whom have described publicly how hard it is to manage a severe dual-diagnosis and what the setbacks could be.  With the help of religion, medication and self expression, he as others have found a way out of addiction and learned to maintain their symptoms of dual diagnosis, without having to return to the shadows.

 

Written by Donald S.

Strength in Mental Health Recovery

The inner strength of the consumer going through Recovery comes from many sources. There are material sources; housing, health care, transportation and a solid means of communication, one source being the telephone. This material gives the consumer, the mental health client, the ability to move forward in their Recovery. When stricken with poverty, there exist a lack of resources and there is no assurance in Recovery when a person is befallen with a mental illness, in essence there is no way for them to reach out.

Strength in Recovery involves a different dimension of responsibility; it involves associating with other people; being a member of the community. It means being connected to friends, neighbors, and family. Living in social and personal isolation, poverty, withdrawal, having poor social skills, poor health causes not only social stigma yet a stigma of self which slows the journey of Recovery and heightens a weakness within the consumer.

Though I am going through the Recovery process and becoming self sufficient; a recovered addict and alcoholic, not to mention being dual diagnosis, I still struggle with acceptance, even in the new neighborhood I live in. News travels fast when your striking it rich or you have done wrong and as I have had to find a way to be socially accepted, my inner strength seems to grow and not having many friends because of the changes I have made from old to new, I was not willing to be socially stagnant; I had to find my niche, being mentally ill, I had to grow in strength and know what to accept.

This all becomes a matter of physical, emotional, mental and spiritual and these aspects changed the way I see the Recovery process. I had to learn to become optimistic and see my life with a purpose. Finding strength in your Recovery is in essence gaining power and control over your life through a righteous choice, using the resources you have gained and learning to self manage your treatment, choosing how you see yourself and the quality of your life.
Written By Donald Sammons