Making Decisions

Have you ever taken the time to think a problem through? Wondering if the scenario of such was worth it? Wishing you had time to think or do something else? Decisions, decisions! The reality of deciding, solving a problem, making a judgment or determination is based on sharing thought, or just quiet time to add one plus one.
Being a consumer of mental health, I had just recently had to face a decision which to me seemingly changed my outlook on myself, and question reality. Having received Disability payments for nearly more than 20 years, and having given up drugs and alcohol to change my life, I began working; this was three years ago. I have never worked more than 6 months in my life, and I am still in shock. That’s a lot for a person who is dual-diagnosed! I recently had to decide if I wanted to continue to work, or go back to the disability payments I was receiving. This was no threat by anyone to me, my co-workers were kind enough to help me during this time, as the disability offices were denying me Medicaid, and SSI, because of the amount I was being paid on the job. I thought of comfort of not having to rise early in the morning; of not having to make lunches, of dressing the way I wanted to dress, of going to the parks around town, and basically hanging out with my old associates. Nothing began to add up! The world as I have briefly sketched began to look dim to what I had already accomplished and what of new friends; I couldn’t let my fellow workers down, with all the rhetoric on changing my life and how others had helped me. I suddenly became—trashed! Not with drugs or alcohol, but with indecision.
Decisions are a painstakingly set of mathematical intercises in word, each adding up to a summation of good, and righteous movements, or they can be disastrous; ‘Nelly the cow ran away because of demands, and not enough time’. What I am trying to say is that a person who is dual-diagnosed with a mental handicap or a person facing economic disaster has to determine what the best course to work towards is. As a mentally handicapped employee, I have assistance from case managers, therapist, nurses and those that do care about my well being; they can help me make a decision when I can look no further or "father" other positive thoughts to remedy any situation. We may be seemingly be dependent people, yet we are taught, even given the ability to ask and seek answers’, instead of reacting to a wrong situation, or even one which may be positive, even though we may not realize it at first.
The right decision means success and the experience of making the right determination means that you have overcome the worrisome plight you had been suffering.
“There is no failure, except in no longer trying.”
E. Hubbard
Written by:
Donald Sammons