Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Life after mental illness

Is life different after my breakdown? It did a 360 degree turn for the better. Although, I could not have known at the time that it would get better. Then being brought back to being sane in the State Hospital who could have guessed. I’ve been thinking when things do not turn out right, where would I be if I did not have a mental illness. I can truthfully say that I would be in prison for life or possibly a homeless alcoholic. I would not want either of those scenes. I was once asked if drinking was so miserable, why did continue to keep drinking then. I said, I knew no other way. That was the only way I knew how to deal with life and thought everyone did the same. I say I would be in prison, because when I did drink bad situations always happened whether or not I tried for them. I look at all I have now and even though it is not everything I would want, I would not trade it for my past life. In all those years I could not have imagined that I would have three grandchildren, and they would bring me so much joy. I also could not have imagined that I would have a mental illness. I remember as a paperboy going to the Winchell’s on west Colfax across from the Bernie Valdez center. I did not know the name then. I remember seeing the people who had mental illness that lived there. That one day I also would have a mental illness. I have accumulated quite a bit of stuff since I left the State Hospital. Also quite a bit of knowledge and would not change a thing.

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