Medication

There are a few reasons why I take medication for my mental distress. I wrote in last week’s blog that I took Moban and Kemidrin for side effects. One of the side effects when I took these medications was that when I drank coffee it brought on my psychosis. It only happened when I had more than two cups a day. Back then I liked more than two cups a day. I did not like being psychotic, because to me it was hell. I mean when I was psychotic I could not control me. I hate not being in control of myself. I quit coffee; I believe it was harder to quit coffee than cigarettes. I would rather give up something than be psychotic. Another reason I take medication is one time they lowered my medication too much. I went to bingo and drank coffee and blacked out what I did with my money and the whole night. It really scared me, that is one reason I work on my memory so much, because I hate forgetting something and blacking out when I am sober. They say schizophrenics have bad memories. I do not believe I do because when I have a problem that requires remembering events I can. Those are the reasons I take medication. As I wrote in an earlier blog, called My Recovery, I am now on 80mg of Geodon. I can now drink coffee, although it is not the same. I just have two cups in the morning even though I could drink more. For me being psychotic was hell and I do not want to go back there ever. The people that could do with out medication, I applaud them. Which do you choose medication or not?